Soon enough I will be back to my busy everyday routine. Don’t get me wrong I like having a schedule, in fact, I love knowing what I have to do in all parts of the day, it makes me feel in peace as I know I have planned what I need to do and I feel like my days ends up being more productive. In a few days I am going back to school and therefore the school mindset will come back but what I need to do this time is fighting it.
Spending three weeks at home was amazing. I had time to read, take long baths and ‘waste’ my time doing the things that I never have time to do when I have school. What needs to change is the idea of school making me miserable because otherwise, I will barely make it another year.
“My parents hate me” I was thinking. It was a Monday morning, my energy levels were low but the motivation was high therefore it’s the ideal time to do school work and the wrong day to do a workout, according to my way of thinking… and they wanted to go running in a dog park? That’s exactly the reason why I believe that my family consists of four random totally different people and their pets living under the same roof!
At some point, I got lost in my thoughts as I was day dreaming and I realized that the dog park was not such a bad idea. It was a reminder that this is the point of life. All these spontaneous moments are what make it worth it. Children’s laughs, dogs barking, and people walking and talking about their problems or sometimes having a light conversation about things that don’t really matter to them but are fun to talk about.
I got lost in the forest even if it was just a bunch of trees really and a path that was divided into sections. The hills, nature, not seeing cars for a while or at some point completely alone I noticed that this made me feel in peace with nature and in peace with myself. It reminded me of that time that my best friend and I decided to go to a concert two hours before it was starting. It was an hour away and we got in the car wishing that we would find tickets when we got there. Thankfully we found tickets and had the best night, we danced, we laughed, we observed people. There was this really tall person standing next to me and I was surprised at how tall he looked even next to my best friend who looks like a giant to me, she’s so tall.
It was a fun night due to our spontaneous decision to make the most out of it. We knew that there was no point of studying for a few more hours. We were doing school work all day and our brains were tired, we needed a break. Similarly, in life, we need small breaks from what we are doing. We need a break every day, from reality, we need some time to do something that we like and something that will make us then be more productive when we sit down to do school work or just work.
This is what is missing from my life at the moment. Those minutes that I take now to light a candle, read five pages from a book or even write down a poem that will help me understand and come in touch with my emotions. It is a hectic big world out there and the workload can sometimes be extreme.It can consume your entire life make you forget the reason you are alive, to actually live and not just exist. I believe that if there are planning and right timing for everything then it is possible to have balance and be happy, stay healthy and on top of things.
Take your dog for a walk, meditate, talk to a friend. Give yourself a break. You need it.
What I am trying to say is that you should plan your day but you should never plan relaxation time, be instinctive about it. You know when you need it when you feel like you are drowning and you can’t take it anymore.
Note to myself to follow my own advice and survive school, thrive at school, stay positive and have balance in my life.
Have a great day!
Cheers to the Teenage Years,
The Quiet Girl.